Dating Quiz


What kind of questions should a Christian ask on a first date?
Hi Christian Dater;

When a Christian decides to date, it is very important that the person is personally clear about their purpose for dating. Are you dating to have some fun? Are you dating to just have someone to hang out with? Are you dating whosoever is interested in you to pass the time until the right one comes along? Are you dating in anticipation of getting married? Please understand, dating for any other reason than to get married is VERY DANGEROUS and I do not recommend it!

It’s very important that a person learns themselves, becomes comfortable with who they are, and allow the Power of God to heal past hurts before they start dating. Failure to do so can cause much pain, disappointment and some consequences you are stuck with for the rest of your life. Worse of all, it still may not fulfill your purpose for dating in the first place.

But to answer your question Anonymous, I believe you should ask the other person what is their purpose for dating. It doesn’t have to be the first question, but it should definitely be A question. All other inquiries should fall into the categories that are important to you. For example: spirituality, family, education, work, hobbies, likes and dislikes. You do not have to get all your questions answered on the first date; and do not ask a question you are not prepared to answer.

In the meantime, I pray you find Joy in all the wonderfulness that is the Lord, and that you take full advantage of ALL the opportunities your single season avails to you.

Thanks for submitting your question.

May God bless you with Wisdom, Knowledge and Understanding!

Joy to the World

For the Love of Money

We’ve all heard and/or used the phrase that money is the root of all evil…

…. but realistically we need money for one’s most basic needs in today’s society. Money is used to pay for water, shelter, and food for example; so how could that equate to evil. The fact that you have money does not mean that you love it and having none does not automatically mean you don’t. The interpretation is where confusion comes in. The LOVE of money can be the root of evil; although extreme; it is relevant. This article will discuss some ways to realize when you may be IN LOVE with money. Are you physically affected? Has your passion for money ruined a relationship or your family life? Have you become greedy, you never have enough money?

Wanting to live comfortably and have the finer things in life is not a bad thing, but what will you sacrifice to have it? Are you so stressed about money that other parts of your life begin to suffer? Bill wants to take his family on a real vacation this summer but he knows he will need at least $3000 to cover travel and expenses. He got a second job to try and save up for the trip without bothering his wife, but money issues just seemed to keep showing up. He was so stressed because his body was missing the rest it needed because of the extra hours he was working.

The stress kept building and Bill realized that his health was beginning to fail because of it. He was making more money but it seemed that he still could not save the funds needed for the trip. So he was willing to sacrifice his health which could easily lead to his life, for extra money. Kudos to Bill for wanting to make his family happy with a vacation but it won’t be much of a vacation if he is too sick to go.

Has a relationship become strained because of some situation dealing with money? There are some people who will not loan or borrow money from friends or family members because of the risk of an issue arising.
Jane was one of those people that took pride in being independent and doing things on her own. Unfortunately, this caused her to be a target for her friends to want to ask to borrow money from her. Her best friend had a major car issue and begged Jane for the funds to fix the car. Jane agreed but only after her friend promised to pay the loan off within two months. After six months passed with no payment, Jane became angry and grew tired of literally begging for her money back. She felt that she did not have any other choice but to take her friend to court, which ultimately ruined their friendship. Their ruined friendship trickled over into their families and caused a lot of grief.

Can a person really be honest with themselves and realize that they have become greedy? Any amount of savings is not enough, even when bills become less, they still aren’t low enough. John grew up poor and vowed once he was grown that he would not live poor again. He became obsessed with money no matter how much he had, he always needed more. In his mind, he was simply preparing for his future but he didn’t realize that his constant search for money made people uneasy. Money was the first thing he thought about in the morning and the last thing on his mind before bed. It soon took over his life and he became very lonely and realized that loneliness was living poor in a much worse way.

Money issues are hard to talk about but it is inevitable and necessary to educate our culture about it. If anyone reading this feels that they are falling in love with money please talk to someone close to you. That’s the first step to fixing any problem; admitting it then getting some help to walk through it. Reach out to friends, family, or your pastor for help. Please don’t hesitate to reach out to me if you need an objective person to simply help you sort things out. I want to leave you with this scripture:

I Timothy 6:9-11
“But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs. But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness.”

Beat Brows – 7 Steps to Achieving the Perfect Eyebrow

by: Mz. Red Carpet


I felt we should go back to the basics, brows going first! I’ve been seeing some brows out here that are out of control, just a hot mess! Ladies, things we NEED to remember about our brows is that they are sisters NOT TWINS. Also, remember that a BLACK pencil is NEVER an option for your brows. #StopItAlready. I’m tired of seeing you all looking like Elvira!  #ItsNotCute! The pictures below demonstrate how I achieve my brows. It’s really simple, so grab your beauty bag and let’s get started!!!

  • IMG_4271Start with clean brows
  • Tweeze away any unwanted hair or stubble
  • Outline your brows using a dark brown pencil (start with the bottom of the brows)
  • Outline the top of your brows using a soft hand
  • Swiftly apply soft strokes through your brow with the brown pencil and blend
  • Use a small angled brush to blend everything (brushing with a spool can help with harsh lines)
  • Sculpt your brow by applying a lighter shade of concealer under your brow bone (darker concealer is an option)
  • Use your finger to blend into your skin
  • Blend the concealer using a kabuki brush for a flawless look

I hope that you take my little advice and use it. Better brow days are ahead. To see more looks I’ve created follow my Instagram @mzredcarpet1 Until next time…

Bye SugahsScreenshot_2015-09-14-21-49-49-1

One Bite At a Time – Deliciously E Review

by: Erica McGowan



This month’s bite comes from Haagen-Dazs ‘s new Artisan Collection that features various chefs, chocolatiers and people who create mouthwatering food. The Spiced Pecan Turtle co created with Chocolatier, Christopher Elbow, featuring his spiced pecan turtles, is a cool yet delightfully warm mouthful of chocolate ice cream, caramel swirls, and chocolate covered spiced pecans! You’ll wish for it never to end. Get it now while you can find it!

Food Stop

One could conjecture a while regarding the merits of a good breakfast. While traveling I delight in finding the best food around the country. This month’s feature is Southport Grocery & Café located at 3552 N Southport Avenue in Chicago, Illinois. The staff was very courteous, unpretentious and it was a relaxed and semi posh atmosphere! The restaurant is located on Chicago’s North side and boasts not only an eaterie, but also a grocery store that stocks wonderfully unique food items that are sure to pique your interest. The bread pudding pancakes, along with the biscuits, eggs and bacon were breakfast heaven. Uniquely, the Lavender Vanilla tea was an unexpected pleasure. Southport Grocery & Café rates five forks from me.

“Flawed” Love

by: Esperanza Cherry


My head is pounding, it’s like I can hear and feel my heart beating in my head. My eyes are heavy as I open them to see the rising sun through my bedroom window; a sight I thought I would consider beautiful but instead I dread the blended color of reds and orange rising up to kiss the sky. The colors are a reminder that my time for sleep has ended even though it never really started. I guess my baby Milena takes the rising sun as a special message to her that her shift for keeping her mother up with her cries to rock her, nurse her and change her are now over and she stretches her arms above her head like a marathon runner through the finish line and slips into a peaceful slumber.

Just like clock work my toddler calls out my name alerting me that her shift has begun. Just as I start rubbing my eyes and preparing my mind to get up to face the new day, my husband lifts himself up from our comfortable bed and responds to her calls. I rest my tired eyes and smile to the lovely sound of my husband whispering to my daughter “ let’s go make breakfast, Mommy is tired and needs to sleep. ”

It is something as simple as knowing that I could use more rest and taking control of a situation to look out for me that makes me fall in love with my husband over and over again. Just the fact that my husband was considerate enough to use hushed tones to speak to my daughter was enough for me to feel loved by him. This was something very meaningful to me but it was only meaningful because I chose to make an effort to notice and appreciate the kindness in my husband.

In this situation, my heart could have been in a different place. Instead of feeling blessed by him I could have thought things like “ It’s about time he got up” or “ took him long enough” or I could have simply taken my opportunity for sleep and not have given it any thought at all.
Many times in marriage it can be so easy to get caught up in the world’s lies that tell me “he has to do this or that ” or “it’s his job to do this…”; that we as wives begin to take for granted the things our husbands do for us, we become ungrateful. Expecting it be part of our husband’s obligation to do things like throw out the garbage, cut the grass, or get the kids does not allow us to be thankful for the things they do for us, whether it be big or small. We can begin
to miss all of the ways our husbands bless us and then sadly, the lack of gratitude can becomes reciprocal. If we never point out and value the efforts in our husbands, it becomes easier for them to do the same to us as wives.

In my marriage it has been a real blessing to me to hear my husband thank me for washing the dishes every single time that I wash them. He does this because he knows I absolutely hate doing them but it brings me joy to do them when I know he appreciates me. I do the same for him, when he leaves for work in the morning I pray with him and thank him for working so hard and providing for our family, because I know he would much rather be spending time playing with our children. I sometimes send him a text or an e-mail and tell him I appreciate his hard work and I can’t wait for him to come home. There maybe times where I may not say the actual words “thank you” but I always make an effort to welcome a spirit of gratitude in my heart so I may notice even the small things. Even just having this attitude of thankfulness towards my husband is something that he is able to notice and blesses both him and our marriage as a whole.
Let’s be a great support to our husbands and make our best effort to never take them for granted. Let’s have a spirit of appreciation towards the smallest and greatest things they do alike. We are blessed to have them and we want to let them know that they are loved and reminding them consistently that we are immensely thankful for all they do always.

Love Your Heart

Hey girl, what’s your New Year’s resolution? I’m sure you’ll hear that line over and over again as the new year kicks off. Common resolutions are related to relationships, eating healthier, exercise, spiritual and career goals and more. Unfortunately, many of these resolutions are short lived for some. This year, I’d like to encourage you to develop more than just a resolution, but a lifestyle habit. More specifically, I want to encourage you to “Love Your Heart” by adopting a lifestyle that will foster a healthy heart. Of course you’re #YoungAndSnatched right now, but your current actions determine your health outcomes when you grow wiser. Since February is American Heart Month, lets discuss heart health.


Let’s begin with a few facts. Heart disease is the number 1 killer of women, which causes 1 out of 3 deaths per year. Signs for heart attack are different for women than men. Signs to look for are as follows; pain in the chest, stomach, arm, jaw, neck, shoulder or back shortness of breath, sweating, unusual fatigue, nausea and vomiting.

How does the heart and blood vessels work?


Together, the heart and the vessels make up the cardiovascular system. Cardio = heart and vascular = vessels. Your heart is the muscle that is responsible for pumping blood throughout your body by way of the blood vessels. The blood carries all the nutrients and oxygen to your organs like your liver, brain, intestines, ovaries, uterus, bones and skin, which allows them to function properly. As you can imagine, your arteries need a free flowing space for the blood to easily flow, like picture number 1 in the figure.


In the event that your vessels are blocked with plaques- cholesterol/fat (picture 2 in the figure)- the space becomes smaller causing decreased blood flow to organs. Decreased blood flow causes damage or death to tissues. For example, when your heart is unable to pump blood to the brain, it causes a stroke. Likewise, when the heart is unable to pump blood to itself, it causes a heart attack.



Finally, let’s discuss how you can Love Your Heart!

Exercise: Knowing that your heart is a muscle, giving your heart exercise is just as important as giving your leg or arm muscles exercise. Thirty minutes of exercise daily is best. Activities that raise your heart rate like jogging, dancing, speed walking and playing sports like basketball, volleyball, tennis will all do great. I know, I know! It’s difficult to exercise daily. It’s okay to exercise a few times per week for longer periods of time.

Nutrition: Fatty foods create the plaques we saw in the figure. Those plaques grow over years of eating foods high in fat and cholesterol, starting in school age children. As you can imagine, it’s necessary to watch what you eat now to prevent heart disease later in life. When you’re shopping for your foods, read to food labels and compare the fat and cholesterol content. Make it a habit to pick up foods that advertise that they are low fat to help you better love on your heart. For a more balanced diet plan, take a look at the plate method that I discussed in the November/December 2015 issue.

Well, that’s all for now ladies… Let’s make “loving our hearts” a lifestyle habit, rather than a new year’s resolution. Happy New Year to you and yours~ Dr. Jay

True Love! Selfless or Selfish

by: Zetta Johnson


We always hear the famous saying “love is an action word.” Sometimes, it can become very cliche. I must admit, to hear one say they love you but never show it would be very hard to believe.

John 15: 13 says, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” This a great example of the word “Love” in action.

The scriptures let us know that Jesus sacrificed his life on the cross and that was the ultimate example of love. It doesn’t get better than that! His unselfish act to give his life for the world will forever be the ultimate love sacrifice.

While we may believe that nothing can top Jesus’ sacrifice, there is another inspiring story in the bible that also exemplifies love.

There were two mothers who both had newborn babies. One of the mothers rolled over and killed her baby. She was devastated and heart broken and I can only imagine anger she felt towards herself.

The woman took the living baby from the other mother and placed her deceased baby in its place. The other mother realized her baby had been switched and was upset. She took the woman before the king so he could settle the situation.
The king said he would split the living baby in half so that each mother would have a piece since he could not decipher who was the mother of the living baby and the mother of the deceased baby.

Well, the mother of the deceased child was satisfied with the decision. She lost her child already, so and didn’t have love in her heart for the child who was not naturally hers. Wouldn’t you know, the child’s real mother told the king that the other woman could have the baby so the baby would live, even if it wasn’t with her.

From her unselfish decision to give her baby to the other mother the king knew right away she was the real mother and granted her child back to her possession.

True love is not a selfish act. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5 is a passage I love to turn to for the definition of love. It says, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs” (NIV).

During this season when most are wrapped up in finding a valentine I challenge you to question your motives for those you profess to love. Do your actions exemplify selfishness or selflessness?